Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
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