Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
