A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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