i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
