Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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