Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
bring money and cleavage
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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