somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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