grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
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