No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize