There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
