..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
