shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
