The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
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