How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize