If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
this boner is exhausting
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
