As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Someone signed my nipple.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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