office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
