I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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