Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
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