I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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