u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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