My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
