you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I am midnight drunk by noon
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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