ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
What a dumb baby whore.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
