he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
