Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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