Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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