he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
