That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
