it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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