Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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