The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
