Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
