Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
