I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize