ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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