We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
i think i just lost a toe
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize