Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
The air taste purple.
Randomize
