i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
