well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize