so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Randomize
