am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
