I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
