Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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