Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
