Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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