I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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