He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
