That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
