so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
