NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
