To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize