Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize